Where were you when the chips were down?
And suddenly you're comin' round
sending me a small request,
cause you've moved back to my town.
Water under the bridge, you say,
we can start things fresh today.
You say it looks like I'm doing well...
Well you can just go to hell.

CHORUS:
Don't Add me, don't Tweet me, don't ask me to MeetUp
I'm not feelin' that we're LinkedIn,
and all of that virtual friendship stuff
We won't be tumbling together in any kind of weather
online or otherwise
The status isn't complicated - I'd just rather anti-socialize

I don't care how you StumbledUpon me
Please just tag yourself back out.
And if you don't stop suggesting at me
I might have to Yelp and shout.
So I hope that you won't mind
If I politely decline.
You're unfollowed, and unfriended
this Match has unharmoniously ended...

CHORUS

You can ping me seven times a day,
but I'm still not gonna read your blog,
And the picture's cute but there's no way
I'm signing up and voting for your dog,
I don't Like you, I can't comment,
When I Flickr-ed you off, I meant it.

CHORUS